Her Kitchen Table Altar

~keeping faith & family close to heart in a modern world~

praying in old catholic church

“As the sparrow finds a home and the swallow a nest to settle her young, my home is by Your altars, LORD of hosts, my king and my God. Blessed are those who dwell in Your house! They never cease to praise You.

Blessed the man who finds refuge in you, in their hearts are pilgrim roads. As they pass through the Baca valley, they find spring water to drink. The early rain covers it with blessings. They will go from strength to strength and see the God of gods on Zion.

LORD God of hosts, hear my prayer; listen, God of Jacob. For a sun and shield is the LORD God, bestowing all grace and glory. The LORD withholds no good thing from those who walk without reproach.”

PSALMS 84
blooming purple flower

I lay a few stems of flowers on the headstones, light up a tiny candle and begin praying; some, suggested and others, directly from the heart 🤍

Next week we have Halloween already! But it isn’t the only fun/important holiday coming up – there’s more to be modeled for our tiniest disciples ♥

close up photo of blue flowers

I lay a few stems of flowers on the headstones, light up a tiny candle and begin praying;

some, suggested and others, directly from the heart.

Last year on All Soul’s Day, I visited the family graves of Husband Paul’s Grandpa Leonard & my Grandma Linda.

I brought with me a couple bunches of cheap flowers from Walmart, simple votive candles, a lighter, a blanket for kneeling on the ground by the headstone, and a prepared list of prayers.

I’m hoping to be a bit more intentional with my flower selection this year – not like the kind of flower TRULY matters in this process… but it is nice to assign a little extra meaning to things when the opportunity exists.

Here are a few I pulled from an article by Southern Living:

  • Aster: patience, love, and wisdom
  • Blue iris: hope and faith
  • Crimson rose: mourning and sorrow
  • Daffodil: rebirth and hope
  • Daisy: innocence, purity, and happiness
  • Forget-me-not: remembrance
  • Magnolia: nobility, endurance, perseverance
  • Marigold: grief and remembrance; associated with Day of the Dead
  • Pansy: sincerity and thoughtfulness
  • Poppy: consolation and remembrance; connected specifically to the remembrance of World War I
  • Rue: sorrow and repentance
  • Tulip: confidence, affection, and enduring love


This time, I’m making a full day out of visiting the graves of departed family members. I’m pretty sure most of them were baptized, but even if I’m not able to help their souls with my prayers, there’s sure to be dozens more that are able to reap that benefit.


Halloween – All Hallow’s Eve – is immediately followed by All Saint’s Day (November 1st) which is a Holy Day of Obligation honoring all the faithful departed who are in Heaven. {Catholics are “obligated” to attend Mass on this day & participate in Holy Communion to celebrate our Lord in the Eucharist.}

Then we have All Soul’s Day (Commemoration of All the Faithful Departed) on November 2nd when we are urged to pray for all the departed souls who currently rest in Purgatory.

Simply put,

if we are NOT in a “state of grace”

(free from attachment to sin – which is why regular confession is SO important as the Priest dissolves us of our attachment to sin at each confession…)

at the hour of our death, our soul is directed first to Purgatory.

Here, we do not see the beauty that lies in Heaven… but instead are “refined by fire” to loosen those sins we held so that we are able to enter into Heaven as sinless & saintly beings.

A soul may get to Heaven faster with the help of their faithful brothers and sisters on Earth & in Heaven. We can earn indulgences for them through our prayers! 

The NEED & DUTY of praying for these souls can be found in the Book of 2 Maccabees 12:46.

Multiple “Partial Indulgences” can be earned simply by visiting a cemetery and praying for them. Most importantly, don’t forget to say the Eternal Rest Prayer (RIP) while you’re there:

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