~keeping faith & family close to heart in a modern world~


praying in old catholic church

“As the sparrow finds a home and the swallow a nest to settle her young, my home is by Your altars, LORD of hosts, my king and my God. Blessed are those who dwell in Your house! They never cease to praise You.

Blessed the man who finds refuge in you, in their hearts are pilgrim roads. As they pass through the Baca valley, they find spring water to drink. The early rain covers it with blessings. They will go from strength to strength and see the God of gods on Zion.

LORD God of hosts, hear my prayer; listen, God of Jacob. For a sun and shield is the LORD God, bestowing all grace and glory. The LORD withholds no good thing from those who walk without reproach.”

PSALMS 84

blooming purple flower

Reason #496 Why I LOVE MAC

red and beige balloons

My 2.5yr old son already has quite an imagination, perfect for storytelling. I find myself listening closely when he talks to others, just to be sure he doesnโ€™t completely blindside them with one of his silly comments…


Last night, Cam fell asleep earlier than normal so I laid her down in the portable bassinet in hopes that she might stay content and slumber until morning. Paul had been at work already for several hours and wouldnโ€™t be home until morning. So, it was just me and Mac awake for his bedtime prayers.

I started off like I usually do, blessing him with a quick touch of the hand then continued on to gratitude for the essentials, non-essentials, and health of our family. There must have been a lot weighing on my mind because I found myself just rambling on.

A few times, during bedtime prayers with Mac, weโ€™ve thanked the Lord for taking Gemma up to Heaven to make her better there. Last night, I simply thanked the Lord for giving Gemma to our family, for blessing us with countless laughs and cuddles in the short time we had her.ย 
Eventually, I found a good stopping point, ended prayers & was trying to convince Mac to get comfy so I could cover him up and make my exit.
Mac was trying to keep me in there by talking about all the things he wanted to do… and people he wanted to see. Attempting to regroup his focus again, our next conversation went something like this:


Mama: โ€œDo you still like the blue sky waves?โ€ย 

Mac: โ€œYEAH! Sky waves anโ€™ green dots.โ€

I point up to the ceiling where his projection nightlight is shining calming blue waves of color.

Mama: โ€œIs God up there?โ€

Mac: โ€œYEAH! God is up thereโ€ฆโ€

then a few words I couldnโ€™t distinguish, followed by…

โ€œGemma got a band-aid.โ€

He said it just like he had seen it with his own eyes! After a very brief pause due to the unexpected nature of his comment, I continued again.

Mama: โ€œYep, thatโ€™s right! God gave Gemma lots of band-aids. Our GOOD God brought Gemma to live in Heaven with Him so he could make her better. Gemma loves you and misses you SO MUCH.โ€

Mac: โ€œDaddy anโ€™ Sissy anโ€™ Mac anโ€™ Mama an’ Bayaโ€ฆ anโ€™ Mac anโ€™ Sisโ€ฆ goinโ€™ to God.โ€

Mama: โ€œAww, wow, we all get to go live in Heaven with God??

Mac: โ€œYEAH!โ€ย 

Mama: โ€œYou are gonna impress upon a lot of people, Buddy. Always remember just how much God loves you.โ€

architecture art cathedral chapel

This miraculous little human was grown from scratch, heaven-sent special for Paul & I. Yet, he continues to amaze me โ€“ I had no idea that these precious, once-in-a-lifetime moments even existed. 
In the quiet, leaning forward from my โ€œworship positionโ€ on the floor, I laid my head down next to his. The little guy quickly wiggles his arms free and wraps them around as much of me as he could reach.